Okay so its been a long time since I have posted a new blog post. This mostly has been due to some personal and difficult situations in life that yeah partily have had my status as a transgender person in effect of it. But mostly I wanted to let the massive Trans coverage to die down some before working on discussions in the future. But recently I have been getting emails from groups to discuss these topics as a quasi expert on the subject. So let me start by saying what I always like to say.
I am not a medical expert, I have no medical degree and the advice and discussion of any issues you have should be directly addressed with your own medical professionals.
Now lets talk about something here.
The divisiveness of the media on begin Trans.
We live these days in a world of self celebrity, self experts, and we get offended on things when one disagrees with our opinions verses theirs. This is basically why in today's world we appear to be at each others throats more then normal. Be the issues of politics, law, religion, or what one does with their own bodies.
When one puts a positive spin on a issue about a type of person... in this day and age of social media and reporting, so called experts which generally end up being people with no education or desire to seriously spend time on a subject involving this subject make their opinion known and try to shout it for their own social messaging mountain top.
Lets look at the Transgender bathroom issue as it came to be.
1. President Obama, in May 2016 signed in an executive order to force public schools to allow trans children to use the bathrooms of their chosen gender.
2. Conservative Media in turn fired back, claiming that the bill would allow men to quote "rape" our women and children by simply claiming to be trans.
[ http://www.snopes.com/obama-transgender-bathrooms/ ]
3. This action caused other things to fall in line... such as Target allowing the same as the executive order in their stores. Countless attacks on people (be they trans or not trans) from people that stand against this action. And even the next president Donald Trump (despite how those against him feel including his VP) coming out in support of the action. [ https://www.nytimes.com/politics/first-draft/2016/04/21/donald-trump-says-transgender-people-should-use-the-bathroom-they-want/ ]
Now while the question of how the action came about to law is a issue. The fact is most both for and against don't really discuss facts of the issue, but more focus on opinions and possibilities through fear.
But that is the problem, In this day and age of self celebrity and self experts, we focus more on the power of opinion and fear, then on facts involved.
Fact:
Nothing really stopped trans people from using the bathroom of their chosen gender before the action was in place.
Fact:
There is violence to Trans people that has risen since this bill has been in place. But this includes none trans people being falsely accused and attacked.
Fact:
There are a handful of cases that yes people are trying to abuse the action to gain access to another gender for the wrong reasons.
That's the issue with any positive / progressive law such as this bathroom bill. There will always be people there to abuse such a policy.
The best example of this can be seen on Halloween when a person leaves a bowl full of candy with the sign take one! Now if the world of people where honest and actually did the right thing everyone would take one and it would be fair to all. But the world isn't fair and yes there are people out there that will take more then others.
But what people fail to understand is its a personal morality that one has to avoid. You have to make yourself the better person and when given the chance to follow the rules.... YOU DO!
Morality is not a solely religious product. You can know right from wrong personally. But there is one issue to look at. Your self judgement is not given a right to damn others. Are there laws in which society have been built on yes. Do we sometimes need to go through those laws and change them based on the times, yes.
But there is something we need to remember in life when such laws are made or changed. People will be against a decision just as much as they are for it. What we need to do when making such laws is to have a civil and social discussion. The key word being CIVIL. With the election of Donald Trump we have seen far too many of what people call civil actions and calls of peace. From people that are doing just the opposite. They are burning cars, beating people, and destroying businesses because they are for or against Trump and his views. This is the furthest from civility, its anarchy! You cant demand peace and love as you beat a man in the streets for whom you disagree (more so when you are doing it by pure assumption) Its not civility its Assault! Its vandalism, its destruction of property These are violations of the law and not only does't help win people over to your issue. It makes you seem no better then a spoiled child throwing a fit over not having things their way.
Want your message heard. Then speak it. Protest peacefully, but don't cause your protest to hurt or disrupt the lives of others. When you disrupt people you think your getting your voice heard, but all you really do is piss off others with your actions. Do things in your personal life to change the view of others. Be the better person. Dont demand it of others. You have to be.
To be civil is the best way to get what you want in life. As the old saying goes, give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will eat for a life time. Such a action is how you succeed in life by teaching your view and finding ways to win over people with your actions that help them in kind. You change their minds by showing people who you are as a different person. You do this following the laws.
Again I return to the point I made comparing the civil rights movement how to win hearts and change minds people preferred the actions and words of Martian Luther King vs the words and actions of Malcolm X. Because he was civil and made sure his protests where peaceful and changed minds with such actions and words. vs X's actions and words of divisiveness and violence to get his way.
When we have such laws, as the bathroom law, we need to be peaceful as those against us get violent. Let them be shown for their ways. Win hearts be positive call out those that do abuse the law, But be respectful and to those that stand against it. Make your voice be herd but don't silence the voice of opposition, because freedom of speech protects the speech we disagree with. (It wouldn't be needed to protect speech we agree with).
Are there voices we disagree with in the world.... Yes.
Are there issues we will disagree on ... Yes
Do we have a right to stand on our social mountain and speak our mind.... Yes
Do we have a right to demand others listen and follow our opinions in life.... No
Do we have a right to fight, attack, beat, destroy property of those we disagree with .... No
Do we have a right to disagree on the laws and actions of those in power .... yes
How do we change things if we do.... Speak your mind and get out and Vote to change things.
This is what it means to be civil in this world. I would wish people took the time to stop and give the news time to settle in the world, spend time researching something before blowing up about it. But sadly humanity is an impatient beast. We must teach our self to have restraint and research the actions of others, before we do something rash with our own actions that we may eventually greatly regret.
Thank you for reading the post and may your heart find peace, love, and your mind be civil to control the passions that come from your heart.
Till then I will keep walking this path in life.
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